To Sterling Mattern on his 16th birthday

A Birthday Poem to My Son

I miss you my champ, that smile, our swims, that laugh, and things we could be doing together?

I’m so lonely and sad, as you gaze and grin down from the ultimate rarefied air.

Today is your 16^th birthday to celebrate,

In your absence, I must trudge along and a modicum of peace I must create.

I so want to honor you and smile a bit,

But on this second birthday without you, all I want to do is cry and sit.

The gift you give me today as I weep, are the great and lasting memories,

Your quiet, confident, kind and warm smile did not have any enemies.

It is quite depressing as life all around goes on without a blink,

But my deepest desire is to spend the time that was stolen from me and laugh and cry and cheer and be happy!

Never let go of the many times we had camping, jet skiing, riding bikes, playing catch, jumping, laughing and playing. The hours in the playroom building a lego project or a model, to doing that homework that was just not as fun- I miss it all and more. Like cooking together- chopping, flipping eggs, and tasting as we go.

I want to go scuba driving and teach you to drive a car

My son, the only thing that keeps me going on to walk, stubble and run

is the hope and faith in seeing you again, because of God’s one and only son.

So for now, my beloved and lost son, I will say goodbye for now,

I look forward to seeing you again, as fast as time will allow.

Happy Birthday Sterling Mattern

Your Daddy I Will Always be!

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